Small Girl, Big World

Cornell: perhaps the most adventurous of the chapters in my story so far. I am now a Cornell University Summer College alum and I cannot express how amazing it feels to be able to say that. I packed a bag and flew across the country because I took a chance at what was the journey of a lifetime. And that it was.

I am now back in the Bay Area, a completely different person. A girl with a different perspective on what the world is and what it has to offer. I encountered many of the greatest leaders from around the world, learned about their organization and contributions to society, and made some great friends along the way.

This summer I was given a chance. Everyone was on my side and that was the most reassuring feeling. I was independent, on a completely different level. I loved it. It was the best being able to do things on my terms, what I wanted, when I wanted it done and how every day was going to look. I was able to wake up every morning and look in the mirror and see my eyes full of life from the rush of this new world I was experiencing.

The Ivy League, never in my wildest dreams would I have been to even guess I would end up there. I’ve seen it now, I’ve seen the game, I learned how to play it. I had to step outside my comfort zone to make friends and speak up in class. I took out my own trash, walked down several stories to do my laundry, I gave my all in Inspiring Leadership, and I’m so proud of myself.

I brought back much more with me than a bronzed glow and a piece of paper from one of the most prestigious universities. I now have a new approach to my career, the organizations I work with, and the relationships I have with those a part of my community. My goal now is to foster the same community I had experienced, one of teamwork, hard work, diligence, and responsibility. Seeing these outstanding youth, only inspired me to strive even more for where I come from, to start small and not only help an organization and vision grow, but grow with it.

I blinked and I’m back home, like I said I would be with a great story to tell. I’m the same me, with a new purpose: to inspire, to create, to grow. So for now, goodbye Ithaca, goodbye Cornell, goodbye everyone who changed my life in ways I can’t even begin to describe. We’ll meet again, hopefully soon.

Thank you ILC, for helping me live the dreams I had been chasing since I was little, when I would envision myself in the future, before the world was so big. I’m still that small girl, in a big world doing big things. No one thought I could make it, so here’s to the ILCers who will go on to make a difference because someone invested in them, here’s to those who were not afraid to make that investment. Here’s to the best summer of my life, and most importantly here’s to myself. I would never have been able to do it without the ILC.

Adventure of a Lifetime

It still hasn’t registered that I spent the past three weeks studying at Cornell, one of the nation’s most prestigious universities. It is an opportunity that has genuinely enhanced my life and overall experience. I notice legitimate growth and change in my perspective, intellect, and character. This transformation has honestly been so exciting to witness.

The Clock Tower

I was never as independent as I would have liked to be. It’s not because my family members didn’t allow me. In fact, they have pushed me to excel every step of the way, but anxiety, self-doubt, and constant worrying wrecked my plans. Prior to visiting Ithaca, I worked on this part of my personality and was steadily figuring things out, but the trip helped me reach the level of comfort that I was striving for. 

Living on the sixth floor of South Balch Hall, a ghost town, and having to make my own choices was new. I learned important survival skills. This may seem silly, but the fact that it was up to me to figure out what time I wanted to go to sleep, do laundry, take out the trash, and work on assignments taught me to grow up or have to deal with the consequences. Mama wasn’t there to scold me.

Cayuga Lake

I had the privilege of meeting so many individuals, diverse in background and thought. They have driven me to question my beliefs and think outside the box. These are people that I look up to and admire, close companions I have spoken to every single day since my arrival home.

Studying at Cornell was an incredible experience. I was exposed to a great deal of ideas and concepts that would have been otherwise extremely difficult for me to grasp. Learning about International Law in theory and practice has tremendously impacted me. I hope to acquire even more knowledge regarding the topics that we touched on in class, and share everything that I discover. Showing my community members ways in which they can seek local and international remedies is important to me. I want more than anything to positively impact people’s lives through protecting their fundamental rights as human beings and avidly promoting peace, justice, and equality in the world.

My classmates Robson, Pooja, Sultana, and I have already created our own website sponsored by Professor Brundige and Sharon Hickey. It is dedicated to social activism on a domestic and global scale. We are thrilled about further developing the site and possibly drafting an actual shadow report as a group later on in the year.

Perhaps the most vital insight that I have gained through this trip is for the future. My time here at Cornell has taught me my own preferences. I've learned that I definitely need to be surrounded by natural beauty in the future, like in Ithaca. When class gets stressful, I know that I can rely on my surroundings to ease my mind. I have also found that I would like to apply to more schools on the East Coast and study something along the lines of Journalism in the future.

I deeply thank and appreciate the ILC, Cornell Summer College, and everyone else that has made this journey a possibility for me. None of this would have been attainable without your support and guidance. 

Farewell

Today was very mournful. But it started off frantic as I had planned to finish all my packing by yesterday, but I fell asleep in the middle of my packing. I woke up to a call from my chaperone Deven who said he was arriving soon so I ran around and packed as fast as I could. I was surprisingly fast and finished with time to spare. So I helped my fellow cohort members with their luggage and it was tiring because we had to haul heavy luggage down many stairs, but we finally met up with our chaperone, carried the luggage down more stairs then Deven took our luggage to our hotel and Javaria and I went to have breakfast.

I wasn’t feeling sad or mournful yet because it didn’t set in that this is my last day at Cornell. But I went to the Donlon lounge to see Eunji play the piano one last time. She is super talented and played nearly every song ever written for the piano. I said goodbye to her and went to checkout. I found one thing that I wouldn’t miss. My small, sweaty and not so pretty room.

Today was emotional. I miss Cornell, but I am happy that I am home. I loved every moment I spent in Cornell. I loved my class. It was life changing. It empowered me to create change in my community and with the organization I helped found I am already making steps to do that. I also loved the people. I made friends that I will have for life and that inspire me to change for the better. I loved the entire journey I had with the ILC and I am happy I took the opportunity. This is time in my life that I will look back with fondness and happiness as I remember the people, place, what I learned and how I changed. I would like to say how thankful I am to the ILC and Don Gosney for giving me this opportunity. I would never have done this without you and I thank you from the bottom of my heart.   

I went to Balch to, meet with Sultana and Javaria. I knew Sultana was leaving, but it didn’t seem. Javaria and I sat on her suit cases as a form of “civil disobedience”. We walked out to where Sultana was going to be picked up. We talked and laughed, but when her parents’ car showed up my heart immediately dropped. I realized that it was real and I will be thousands of miles away from one of my close friends. Javaria and Sultana started crying and I tried my best not to, but I let a tear slide. It was hard. Sultana is an absolutely amazing person and it was fantastic that I got to meet her, but it was hard to say goodbye. Javaria and I needed a break to recuperate. This was the moment where my departure became real. I started to realize this is the last time I will see this beautiful campus and the last time I will see all my amazing friends. That thought hit me hard. But also started to think “What’s the point of feeling sad? Just enjoy your final moments.” And that is what I did. 

Javaria and I went to the slope and sat where we always sat with our friends. I thought of how fun it was and I smiled as I looked at the beautiful view that overlooked all of Ithaca. It was nice to go to this place one last time. It was my favorite spot on campus and it was nice to get some closure. I said goodbye to the slope like it was an old friend and went to lunch with my whole cohort.

Before we went to lunch we stopped by Cascadilla gorge to take photos. I always love going there because it was so beautiful, but we spent a short amount of time in the gorge and ate our lunch at a halal. It was good and then we were off to Deven’s hotel.

From there we picked up our suite cases and other things and head off to Ithaca airport. As we sat there waiting for our plane I spotted some people I recognized from the Summer program. I talked with them a little before I boarded my plane that departed from Ithaca and landed in Philadelphia.

On the plane I left Cornell behind in my mind. From then on I focused on home. I missed home-made food, my cats and my friends. It was discouraging that it would be more than 8 hours until I would be home, but I was okay with sleeping on the plane. The plane ride from Ithaca to Philadelphia was very short and kind of disappointing because I wanted to sleep, but all I got was a short power nap.

My time in Philadelphia was short. We found our gate, got dinner and sat down. I was content with sitting down and watching YouTube, but I became aggravated because we had to wait for a flight attendant who was late and then I forgot why, but we were even more delayed. I got a little upset because all I wanted was to see my cats. But after getting on the plane and the plane getting delayed more I fell asleep for the entire plane ride.

When we landed and drove home I was too tired to think let alone be excited that I was home. When we got to El Cerrito High School my entire cohort had a photoshoot. I tried my best to keep my eyes open. Then I saw my mom. Immediately I got energy and became really happy. I missed her so much and it was beyond difficult being away from her for a month. I honestly don’t know how I’ll handle being away from her when I go to college for real. I made it home around 2:30 and immediately fell asleep.

Thanks for the Memories

I promised myself that I wouldn’t get too emotional the last day that we were in Cornell. I was leaving behind valuable friendships, great times, and natural beauty in its purest form. As much as I missed my family and longed for their company, the thought of returning was bittersweet. And yes, I cried, because it’s extremely difficult to control when others are tearing up.

My morning was perhaps the most difficult part. Finishing packing up and cleaning the dorm room was harder than I thought it would be, especially because face powder had spilled all over my makeup bag and parts of the carpet. Wiping everything down wasn’t exactly tiring, but pretty frustrating.

A good thirty minutes later, I checked in with my RCA for an inspection so that she could look around and made sure that nothing in the room was damaged. I had the chance to speak with Angela and hug it out before parting ways. I feel as though we really understood one another the past three weeks. Never once did I feel awkward or uncomfortable in Angela’s presence. Instead, it was quite the opposite and I wish her all the best for the future.

Cornell was a dream come true.

The RCAs are not the only sign that Cornell attracts well-rounded, genuine individuals. My friend Muskaan, studying Architecture at Summer College as an International Student, flew half way around the world for the opportunity. She’s multi talented and incredibly sweet, so I was naturally disappointed when we didn’t end up eating breakfast together for the last time despite having made plans. We spoke over the phone however and promised to stay in touch.

Unhappy to leave.

Sultana left around 11 AM. We visited Donlon together to see Eunji play the Piano for the last time. The songs were all sad and sentimental. Not only that, but Eunji and Wendy had to leave which left Culty and me in a very sad state. She cried and eventually so did I as her parents loaded up the last of the luggage into their car. Saying goodbye was extraordinarily tough, and I had to push myself to think positively and recognize the possibility that we would meet in the near future.

After Culty left, Robson and I went over to the slope one last time. Deven had picked up our luggage at Balch earlier that day, so we didn’t have to worry about carrying anything with us.  Noor and Deven eventually joined us after the Inspiring Leadership class’s graduation ceremony. We took pictures, first at the slope itself and then the Cascadilla Gorge.

The gorge was especially beautiful that afternoon, in a violent yet mesmerizing way. I didn’t want to get anywhere near the water in fear of falling in and getting thrashed about. That wasn’t my plan for the final day in Ithaca.

Baba and I

So, we decided to snap photos and leave for food at the Oasis Halal Grill in College town.

Eating didn’t take too long, and we stopped at Deven’s hotel in the Commons to wait for our shuttle to the airport afterward.  Ithaca airport was tiny, yet pleasant. The people working there seemed to be always smiling and in a constant great mood, which was refreshing.  We took off and arrived in Philadelphia airport in less than an hour.

Our connecting flight in Philly took a while to take off. Apparently, they hadn’t fulfilled the set amount of flight attendants needed and were waiting on a couple. We sat down, ate pretzels, and munched on snacks eagerly awaiting our arrival home. Once we did board, there were issues with incorrect data being sent to the crew so that meant that the plane would taxi for the next hour.

Noor and I attempting to look taller?

Unfortunately for me, motion sickness was a huge issue. I managed to pull through by talking with my neighbor. She had just arrived from Athens, Greece and barely caught the connecting flight. Hearing her troubles made me feel a lot better and more grateful about my situation.

We arrived at SFO around 12:32 AM. Baggage claim went very smoothly. Lisa, our shuttle driver, helped a lot with moving luggage and making sure that we felt comfortable and welcomed. It was cold outside, a feeling that I wasn’t used to after having spent a month in humid Ithaca. Luckily, I was prepared and had packed a jacket in my carry-on.

I appreciate everything that Don has done
for me and this Program. This picture is great. 

I had missed the Bay Area so much, especially the environment and people. It’s not that Ithaca couldn’t provide that, but that still didn’t mean it was some place I could easily call home.  San Francisco felt like home at last!

The shuttle pulled up at El Cerrito High School well after 1 AM. Don was there to greet us. We took our last group photos and spoke for a while about the trip back and hurdles faced by other cohorts.

Then, I saw my dad arrive. Although Mama and I video chatted often while I was in New York, Baba was at work most of the time. So me, being the crybaby that I am, struggled immensely with the lump in my throat as we embraced.

Soon enough, it was time to say goodbye. I made sure to hug everyone before leaving. Don and I took a couple of pictures together. Baba captured them; therefore I couldn’t help but wonder if they had turned out okay, but they were actually really sweet.  

I’m going to miss everyone that I have met and gotten to know on this trip. They might not be aware of it, but each and every one of these people has impacted me in so many positive ways. Here’s to this incredible journey and their happy, healthy, safe, and rewarding futures. 

Ithaca, It's Been Real

Professor Deets and I. 

So I guess this is it, graduation day. I woke up bright and early to pack up the last of my things, clean up my dorm room, and give my luggage to Deven so I could check out with my RCA. The fifth floor of Balch felt oddly quiet today compared to others, some had moved out already, Bella left last night and the majority of rooms were already beginning to be cleared out. I was still getting ready after I dropped off my luggage with Deven who was waiting outside, I was going to graduate Cornell University Summer College later this morning. Javaria and Robson didn’t have one so it was just me who still had a little bit of a hectic morning.

I was saying the final goodbye to all my friends and the bet friends over the course of these past few weeks trying my best not to feel sad because I honestly don’t know when we will all see each other again. I know it will be soon, whether that means back at Cornell, or when we become the world leaders. I went to give some things to Javaria before I went back to Balch for the last time to drop my keys off in the lounge. I was going to call Uber to go to where my graduation was but they were running slow and at higher rates because people were both coming in and out of Ithaca so much. I decided walking would be just fine since I had time. I went to Statler Hall where Deven showed up right on time at eleven.

Josh to my left (works in the union) , and Nick to my
right (he's the firefighter!). 

This was more of a ‘family style’ ceremony as my professor called it. Last year the entire Summer College gathered on one room where every class came up and the instructors spoke about every class and what they did. Where we would sit and listen to every student’s name being called as they walked across the stage. We were in a lecture room which wasn’t too big but had enough to seat all the students who were able to make it for graduation as well as their family members. The TA’s were standing which made Mark talk a little faster about the class. He introduced himself and talked about what we covered in class discussions and the Ivy League standard we were held to with our lengthy essays and five books which we read. As he said, he took up some of our time.

Mark also acknowledged our TA’s, Nick and Josh for all their hard work and contributions to the class with leading the discussion sections as well as giving their own lectures the course about the leadership positions they held as a union leader and Coast Guard member. Then Mark played a video which he put together of pictures that we all sent him of things we did outside of the class like downtown or in the dorms. It was funny because I was in so many of them since I had a lot of pretty pictures from all the blogging I have been doing. It was really cute, and he said we would all have a copy of it, and it was just to show us as leaders, as family.

Then the time came, for our little ceremony. My name was the first one called and when I heard I had the biggest smile on my face. It felt so surreal as he handed me my certificate and I shook my course leaders’ hands, thanking them for changing my life and making me a better leader. Josh, of course, had to tease me about why I was in half the video. I clapped and cheered for my fellow leaders as they went up to receive their certificates which we all worked hard to deserve. We took some group pictures and had our sessions with Mark and the TA’s. Before Mark stopped everyone and stated that he realized he forgot to sign our certificates. I guess he was just as in a daze as the rest of us were. So we all lined up to ask for his ‘autograph’ before saying our goodbyes and taking the last pictures together. And that was it. I did it!

Deven and I met up with Robson and Javaria who were at the slope with some of their friends. We arrived to see them having a photo shoot so we decided to have one our own. After sufficiently embarrassing myself in of everyone staring at me, Deven suggested going to the Cascadilla Gorge Trail since we all went on our won, but not as a group and it was on our Cornell bucket list. We snapped some more pictures after walking down and back up the trail and walked to College town to grab some lunch before heading out to start our journey home.

You can see how I wanted to show it off. 

There are two halal certified restaurants in all of Ithaca. The only one I trusted was never open when I have ever tried to order from there but today it was! Finally, after eating vegetarian for so long I had lamb and it was the best last meal in Ithaca I could have asked for. We went over to Deven’s hotel where I was able to change and just freshen up and get my things together, we were able to sit in the lobby for a bit while Deven mailed off my books so I wouldn’t have to bring them as they were heavy and take up a great deal of space in my suitcase. Our shuttle came and it was a quick drive to the airport, and no problem checking in since the Ithaca Airport in uniquely small and our flight was the only one coming in for the rest of the day.

Lamb, my love. 

We waited for about two hours while Javaria and I were just about leadership work we had to do once we went back and texting friends. One hour in a plane and in the blink of an eye we were in Philadelphia. It was so great not having to run to the other terminal to catch our connected flight, we were just chilling and eating pretzels while the wait dragged on for our plane to begin boarding. Apparently, there was a missing flight attendant who we were all waiting on so in the mean I got my carry on checked since it was complementary.

Once we finally did get on the plane we pulled away from the terminal only to begin ‘driving’ for a while. The pilot came on over the intercom and was saying that they received some incorrect data and needed us to be patient while they worked on getting the correct numbers. I have no idea what that even meant but I appreciated the fact that they let us know what exactly was going on, as well as acknowledging that they were working on fixing it. While I texting don with updates on our adventure the pilot came on and said to be ready for take off. In maybe less than thirty seconds we were off the ground, they sure do work fast.

Outside of Ithaca airport. 

Waiting for so long in the plane and just in the airport in general, it had been a long day so I had a headache, so when the flight attendant brought me some water I took some medicine and knocked out, sleeping on and off for just about the whole flight. It was easy for me to curl up since I was so small but I can’t say the same for Deven and Robson. Finally, we arrived in San Francisco! Oh, how I missed the city and the bridge and the light pollution. There was luckily no traffic so we arrived relatively quickly. 

I was the last one to get picked up, but then again I didn’t expect my dad to be awake in the middle of the night. Don snapped some pictures of us as per usual before we all went home to sleep in our own beds, finally. I went to sleep a different person, in ways words cannot describe. Cornell: a chapter which is perhaps the most adventurous of my story so far. That's a wrap. 

Last one, I promise. 

Here's to Looking at You, Cornell

Today was surprisingly emotional. I knew I would be sad because it was the last day of my course and over the course of these three weeks I fell in love with the course. But also one of my close friends Pooja left today. That made my leaving real and I was pushed to the edge of tears. The entire day wasn’t said, in class we had a great discussion, I finally finished all my classwork, I had a fun time with my friends and I got to meet Sultana’s awesome family. I am very sad that I am leaving such a beautiful place, I am sad that my wonderful course ended and I am sad that I'll be saying goodbye to close friends, but I need to go home. I will always look at this place with fondness and happiness.

My day started late so I practically ran to class. I am glad I made it on time because this class was fun. It was very laid back because we pretended that all our NGOs were in one large meeting discussing the findings during our fact finding mission yesterday and giving recommendations to remedy the situation. I thought it was very interesting to hear the different things that people found and the questions people thought to ask. Everyone found out different things. People’s recommendations were the same though, but I still had fun exploring the different possibilities in helping the people of Moloqua. The part that got me was at the end of the exercise when everybody shared what they like about the class. What I liked about the class is it gave me knowledge and empowered me to make change. Others shared how it made them think of human rights and law in a different way. Thinking back on the great things we learned made me sad that all of it was ending it gave me the urge to cry. But when Sultana, Javaria, Pooja and I presented our organization I got excited because everyone loved the idea and went back up to us so they could join our group. I was so happy that people were interested and it gave me even more hope for the future. I believe that we will be able to make a real difference and it makes me excited.

After class I worked on my assignment and went to my dorm to start packing. After that I went outside of Mary Donlon to say goodbye to Pooja. I almost cried. Over these three weeks I have gotten so close to my friends that it felt like I knew them my entire life. It started to sink in that most of them lived an entire continent away. We hugged fifty times and then she finally left. Pooja is a great and funny person to be around. She is very nice and it was a privilege to know her and be a friend. It has only been a couple of hours and I miss her.

After the almost tearful goodbye I walked with Javaria, Sultana and her family. I liked Sultana’s family her parents were very nice and great to talk to. Her little sister was very cute and really smart. I liked seeing Sultana and her sister horseplay and tease each other. It was funny and cute. We were going to walk to Olin library, but it was closed so we walked around the campus. I loved this because this gave me one last tour around the campus to look around the scenery. It was almost a last goodbye.

I am going to miss Cornell and the course, but I think I am going to miss the people I met the most. I am happy that I made these connections though. Without these connections I don’t think my time here would have been as special or impactful and because of these connections I am now a part of an organization that is fighting for human rights and change. I feel beyond blessed to have met these people. As I slowly pack and look at my suitcase I am mournful for what I will be leaving behind, but excited for these things I’ll do once I go.  

C'est La Vie

Today was it, the last day of Summer College for those of us that were here for three-week courses. Because we weren’t having an official graduation ceremony on Saturday, my friends and I dressed up. I wore my fancy Eid clothes and walked over to beloved Myron Taylor Hall, the law school, for the very last time. I took note of the natural beauty surrounding me as I walked and how much I would miss it back in California.  

Am I a lawyer yet?

 In class, we presented our fact-finding missions and discussed what we had learned through the activity. Afterward, Professor Brundige asked us to reflect and share our thoughts about the course overall. I wasn’t the only one there that confessed to having known very little about international law prior to taking the class, and transforming as a result of it.

It was motivating to hear the impact that this class has had on my classmates. Some (including me) found out that they wanted to pursue careers in related fields. Others were discouraged by the fact that law and justice are not interchangeable. But we were all in agreement that the amount of learning that we accomplished has been astounding, a direct result of mentoring and guidance provided by our knowledgeable professor, and TAs/advisors (Diogo, Naffa, and Carlos).

We had somewhat of an informal graduation.  Professor Brundige walked around the room announcing our names, and handing everyone their certificates. Professor had brought us baked goods and juice to snack on, and I was presented with the opportunity to individually thank all my mentors and peers. It felt great.

Professor Brundige also allowed us time to talk about our website non-profit idea; our classmates seemed to really like it and approached the four of us (Pooja, Sultana, Robson, and I) about contributing. It was incredibly exciting to witness that others were just as thrilled and invested as we were in the project. 

A small group of us students hung out in the courtroom after class. We took pictures, laughed, and made plans for the future. Because we had an opinion editorial due at 5 PM that day, I decided to stay in the building and waiting for the rain to quiet down while I worked. After what seemed like an eternity, I went outside of Donlan to see Pooja off.

Pooja was by far one of the sweetest, most down-to-earth people that I had the opportunity to meet and get to know these past few weeks. She taught me so much, and we laughed together all the time; undoubtedly, I will miss her presence. 

On the way to Donlan, I found Sultana and her family. They were welcoming, and very hospitable. In fact, I was even officially invited to New York to stay with them. 

Sultana’s 10-year-old sister talked to me about her favorite books. Her mother described to me their local mosque and community, and her father and I discussed several historical events as well as the power of maintaining a positive outlook in life. In a few hours of getting to know her family, I realized where Sultana gets her phenomenal personality. 

I'm going to miss these people so much

Robson and I toured parts of the campus with Sultana’s family after Pudge left. It was bittersweet; we were already missing her and touring without her seemed in many ways wrong. 

I found out eventually that I had missed J’nai’s departure as well. It was very disappointing because we had gotten super close and I wanted to at least get one last hug in.

Later on, Robson, Sultana, and I ordered Dominos pizza and watched one of my favorite Hindi movies, ‘Three Idiots’, in Balch. The food was delicious, and Sultana even brought over savory pakoras that her mother had made.

In the end, we parted ways and spent the rest of my day blogging and packing.